My colleague is correct. Sleep eating did "strike back", but in a subdued form. From first glance I perceived the return of sleep eating as mere sloppiness on my behalf.
Why wasn't I using the trash can in my room?
Why are there little wrappers everywhere?
The truth hit me when I found the casing to a snack bar I don't even like in between my bed frame and the wall. Only in my sleep do I eat food I barely enjoy! Sleep eating had entered my life again! This time, however, my subconscious knows the evidence has to be less direct, less incriminating. Previously my affliction felt free to sprawl itself throughout my slumber (I'd eat entire, messy meals), now it knows to curl and conceal itself from me in the form of convenient snack food. Why has my ailment (cure?) chosen to scurry away from me? As discussed before, I believe it is due to my consciousness' reciprocity for my unconsious' desire to sleep eat. This blog's acknowledgement of sleep eating comes too near to consummating the Real desire- to eat while awake, and interrupts the direct relationship between sleep eating and the unconscious mind. The ruptures result in this new subdesire, or subdued desire, and culminates into what Freud would call "residue".
For Freud the residue is the cause of art. Art becomes a storage place for the excess desires the conscious minds has learned is unrewarding to pursue. I am not an artist. I only eat. Therefore the ruptures or short circuits in my psyche make themselves present through my eating habits. For instance, the other day I was close to skipping my volunteer job and after realizing how awful that instinct was, I ate enough Taco Bell, became so sick I should have skipped the volunteer gig and forced myself to go anyway as punishment for the evilness in me inclined to skip.
(LEFTOVERS PT.II is in the works. I plan on tying these theories together with the help of a graph which blames my parents. I just had a birthday and I've found myself less able to use scanners than I was last year. Therefore, the graph will be posted under my partner's name.)
Why wasn't I using the trash can in my room?
Why are there little wrappers everywhere?
The truth hit me when I found the casing to a snack bar I don't even like in between my bed frame and the wall. Only in my sleep do I eat food I barely enjoy! Sleep eating had entered my life again! This time, however, my subconscious knows the evidence has to be less direct, less incriminating. Previously my affliction felt free to sprawl itself throughout my slumber (I'd eat entire, messy meals), now it knows to curl and conceal itself from me in the form of convenient snack food. Why has my ailment (cure?) chosen to scurry away from me? As discussed before, I believe it is due to my consciousness' reciprocity for my unconsious' desire to sleep eat. This blog's acknowledgement of sleep eating comes too near to consummating the Real desire- to eat while awake, and interrupts the direct relationship between sleep eating and the unconscious mind. The ruptures result in this new subdesire, or subdued desire, and culminates into what Freud would call "residue".
For Freud the residue is the cause of art. Art becomes a storage place for the excess desires the conscious minds has learned is unrewarding to pursue. I am not an artist. I only eat. Therefore the ruptures or short circuits in my psyche make themselves present through my eating habits. For instance, the other day I was close to skipping my volunteer job and after realizing how awful that instinct was, I ate enough Taco Bell, became so sick I should have skipped the volunteer gig and forced myself to go anyway as punishment for the evilness in me inclined to skip.
(LEFTOVERS PT.II is in the works. I plan on tying these theories together with the help of a graph which blames my parents. I just had a birthday and I've found myself less able to use scanners than I was last year. Therefore, the graph will be posted under my partner's name.)
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